COSMETIC PROCEDURE

Would you be willing to pay $10,000 to have this  procedure done on your wife, or girl friend, or both?

MARXISM IN AMERICA IS CLOSER THAN YOU MAY THINK

http://www.morningstartv.com/oak-initiative/marxism-america

NASTY FIRE

In South Los Angeles, a 4-plex home was destroyed by a fire. 

A Mexican family of six, all welfare recipients and gang members, lived on the first floor, they died.

An Islamic group of seven welfare cheats, all illegally in the country from Kenya, lived on the second floor and they, too, all perished in the fire.
6 LA, Hispanic, Gang Bangers, & ex-cons, lived on the 3rd floor and they, too, died.
A lone, white couple lived on the top floor. The couple survived the fire.
Jesse Jackson, John Burris and Al Sharpton were furious!!  They flew into LA and met with the fire chief, on camera. They loudly demanded to know why the Blacks, Black Muslims and Hispanics

all died in the fire and why only the White couple lived?

The Fire Chief said, "They were at work"

GET A HANDLE ON THIS!

The female dentist pulls out a numbing needle to give the man a shot.

"No way! No needles. I hate needles," the patient said.

The dentist starts to hook up the nitrous oxide and the man objects.

"I can't do the gas thing. The thought of having the gas mask on suffocates me!"

The dentist then asks the patient if he has any objection to taking a pill.

"No objection," the patient says. "'I'm fine with pills."

 

The dentist then returns and says, "Here's a Viagra."

The patient says, "Wow! I didn't know Viagra worked as a pain killer!"

"It doesn't," said the dentist, "but it's going to give you something to hold on to when I pull your tooth."

YES SIR!

ANIMAL HOUSE

On the first day, God created the dog and said, "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years."

The dog said, "That's a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?"

And God said that it was good.

On the second day, God created the monkey and said, "Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this, I'll give you a twenty-year life span."

The monkey said, "Monkey tricks for twenty years? That's a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the dog did?"

And God, again said that it was good.

On the third day, God created the cow and said, "You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer's family. For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years."

The cow said, "That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty?"

And God agreed it was good.

On the fourth day, God created humans and said, "Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, I'll give you twenty years."

But the human said, "Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?"

"Okay," said God, "You asked for it."

So that is why for our first twenty years, we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves. For the next forty years, we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next ten years, we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren. And for the last ten years, we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.

Life has now been explained to you.

There is no need to thank me for this valuable information. I'm doing it as a public service. If you are looking for me I will be on the front porch.

RELIGIOUS STORY

There were two nuns:

One of them was known as Sister Mathematical (SM), and the other one was known as Sister Logical (SL).

It is getting dark and they are still far away from the convent.

SM: Have you noticed that a man has been following us for the past thirty-eight and a half minutes? I wonder what he wants.

SL: It's logical. He wants to make love to us.

SM: Oh, no! At this rate he will reach us in 15 minutes at the most! What can we do?

SL:The only logical thing to do of course is to walk faster.

A little while later...

SM: It's not working.

SL: Of course it's not working. The man did the only logical thing. He started to walk faster, too.

SM: So, what shall we do? At this rate he will reach us in one minute.

SL: The only logical thing we can do is split. You go that way and I'll go this way. He cannot follow us both.

So the man decided to follow Sister Logical.

Sister Mathematical arrives at the convent and is worried about what has happened to Sister Logical. Then Sister Logical arrives.

SM: Sister Logical! Thank God you are here! Tell me what happened!

SL: The only logical thing happened. The man couldn't follow us both, so he followed me

SM: Yes, yes! But what happened then?

SL: The only logical thing happened. I started to run as fast as I could and he started to run as fast as he could.

SM: And?

SL: The only logical thing happened. He reached me.

SM: Oh, dear! What did you do?

SL: The only logical thing to do. I lifted my dress up.

SM: Oh, Sister! What did the man do?

SL: The only logical thing to do. He pulled down his pants.

SM:Oh, no! What happened then?

SL: Isn't it logical, Sister? A nun with her dress up can run faster than a man with his pants down.

THE SAVAGE

Michael Savage's Thoughts

I’ve asked this question to a number of people and most them respond as if I were crazy for asking. They tell me that this is America, land of the free and that there will always be elections. I tell them that we are no longer the land of the free and that if Obama gets re-elected in 2012, that this just may be America’s last election.

In the past three years, the Obama administration has been very carefully crafting the nation for a political take over by his Marxist regime and this isn’t just my opinion. Popular radio talk show host Michael Savage is the son of Russian immigrants and is very familiar with Soviet and European history. Savage warned his listeners this week saying, “I have to tell you that if this man, God forbid, is the next president of the United States , we’re going to be living in something along the lines of – people say Europe .. I don’t believe it’s going to be like Europe – I think it will be closer to Chavez’s South American dictatorship.

“This is the most corrupt, incompetent, dangerous tyrannical administration in American history. It’s not politics as usual. It’s not just Democrats versus Republicans. Obama has a long history of being at odds with American values and with America itself and the core principles of this country. They don’t want government-sponsored opinions. They only want government-sponsored ‘Pravda.’ That’s exactly what the government-media complex tells you on a daily basis – nothing but the government-media complex party line. Pay attention. Your freedom may be at stake.”

Over the weekend, Republican presidential candidate Rick Santorum told a small group of people in an Iowa coffee house that, “Barack Obama is not incompetent, ladies and gentleman. He knows exactly what he’s doing and why he’s doing it. He sees America differently than you see America . [Obama] has gone out of his way to divide this country in a way I haven’t seen since the Great Depression when Franklin Roosevelt went around to divide this country. That’s his hero. What makes America great [in Obama’s mind is that] the government takes money from somebody and gives it to somebody else. No, that’s what makes America ....... France .” With his control over the Executive and Judicial branches of the government, the stage is set for a complete takeover of the government. Think about it.

Since taking office, instead of helping the economy, Obama has purposely escalated the economic crisis by plunging the country into unprecedented debt. He has a number of programs that are designed to go into effect in January 2013, just in time for his second term of office. The economic burden and increased taxes on everyone will be enough to cause the final economic collapse of the country. As soon as that happens, Obama declares Martial Law and assumes dictatorial control of the nation.

The Department of Justice has already been subverting federal laws to strip us of a number of freedoms. The Supreme Court and many of the other federal courts have been seeded with socialistic liberal judges that will rule in Obama’s favor on virtually anything, thus ending constitutional rule and law.

He’s already changing the face of America ’s military. Allowing homosexuals to openly serve along with changing the retirement program is causing many conservative military leaders to resign commissions and leave the military. Some Pentagon officials are also noting that an increase in the enlistment of radical Muslims into the US military where they get all the training they need on weapons and defense systems. We have no idea how many of them there are in the armed forces or in what positions they may hold.

Obama has been wielding executive powers this past year as if he were already a dictator. When Congress is not doing his bidding, he simply bypasses them and uses an executive order to accomplish it anyway. This has set the stage for his disbandment of Congress. He would not be the first world leader to take control of a nation and disband the legislative branch of government.

He has been effectively using the media to anesthetize the public to the dangers he poses. Like a patient being prepped for surgery, people are numb to the changes and won’t have a clue what took place until they wake up in recovery and realize that free America has been removed and replaced with a regime that may parallel those of Stalin, Lenin, Mussolini, Hitler, Chavez and Castro.

For the sake of our children and grandchildren, I earnestly pray that we are spared from what seems a certain future and that Obama is overwhelmingly defeated in 2012. Otherwise, heaven help us!

LEARN CHINESE IN FIVE MINUTES

PINATA

IS SHE THE PIÑATA?
 Dear Lord in Heaven what has happened to our world??? 

It was what she considered fitting, I guess, to honor and welcome the Spanish Prime Minister. 

They were to attend an outdoor Fiesta Concert celebrating Hispanic musical heritage.   

How DID those people on either side of them keep a straight face? 

Is she the piñata?

  

ABBOTT & COSTELLO GO TO WASHINGTON

COSTELLO: I want to talk about the unemployment rate in America .

ABBOTT: Good Subject. Terrible Times. It's 9%.

COSTELLO: That many people are out of work?

ABBOTT: No, that's 16%.

COSTELLO: You just said 9%.

ABBOTT: 9% Unemployed.

COSTELLO: Right 9% out of work.

ABBOTT: No, that's 16%.

COSTELLO: Okay, so it's 16% unemployed.

ABBOTT: No, that's 9%...

COSTELLO: WAIT A MINUTE. Is it 9% or 16%?

ABBOTT: 9% are unemployed. 16% are out of work.

COSTELLO: IF you are out of work you are unemployed.

ABBOTT: No, you can't count the "Out of Work" as the unemployed. You have to look for work to be unemployed.

COSTELLO: BUT THEY ARE OUT OF WORK!!!

ABBOTT: No, you miss my point.

COSTELLO: What point?

ABBOTT: Someone who doesn't look for work, can't be counted with those who look for work. It wouldn't be fair.

COSTELLO: To who?

ABBOTT: The unemployed.

COSTELLO: But they are ALL out of work.

ABBOTT: No, the unemployed are actively looking for work... Those who are out of work stopped looking. They gave up. And, if you give up, you are no longer in the ranks of the unemployed.

COSTELLO: So if you're off the unemployment rolls, that would count as less unemployment?

ABBOTT: Unemployment would go down. Absolutely!

COSTELLO: The unemployment just goes down because you don't look for work?

ABBOTT: Absolutely it goes down. That's how you get to 9%. Otherwise it would be 16%. You don't want to read about 16% unemployment do ya?

COSTELLO: That would be frightening.

ABBOTT: Absolutely.

COSTELLO: Wait, I got a question for you. That means they're two ways to bring down the unemployment number?

ABBOTT: Two ways is correct.

COSTELLO: Unemployment can go down if someone gets a job?

ABBOTT: Correct.

COSTELLO: And unemployment can also go down if you stop looking for a job?

ABBOTT: Bingo.

COSTELLO: So there are two ways to bring unemployment down, and the easier of the two is to just stop looking for work.

ABBOTT: Now you're thinking like an economist.

COSTELLO: I don't even know what the hell I just said!


And now you know why the administration’s unemployment figures are improving!

SOCKLESS IN SEATTLE

This will scare your socks off!!! It is sort of long, but you really NEED to know this!  These bills are documented in the congressional Records.

Illegal Obama "Propped Up" By Congress! If you never watch another video, watch this one, this proves the Democrats(And some Republicans) know Obama is not an American and is serving illegally and unconstitutionally and the efforts they made are recorded in the Congressional Record, attempting to change the Constitution so he could serve legally. 

EVERYONE who cares about and loves this Constitutional Republic absolutely MUST watch and forward this video!!!!!! This one must go viral. I won't be surprised when the people of this country begin calling for an Impeachment.  This guy and his cronies have been intentionally deceiving the American public and his friends in Congress have been propping him up.. Where are our elected representatives, especially the Tea Party candidates?

CLICK TO OPEN

       http://www.youtube.com:80/watch?v=H3aCfR8rmrw