Sign in an Indiana store-front window!
'WE WOULD RATHER DO BUSINESS WITH 1,000 AL QAEDA TERRORISTS
THAN WITH ONE SINGLE AMERICAN SOLDIER!'
This sign was prominently displayed in the window of a
business in Whiting, Indiana. You are probably outraged
at the thought of such an inflammatory statement.
However, we are a society which holds Freedom of Speech
as perhaps our greatest liberty. And after all, it is just a sign.
You may ask what kind of business would dare post such a sign.
Answer: Owen's Funeral Home
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
TYPICAL WASHINGTON SPIN
The Smith's were proud of their family tradition. Their ancestors had come to America on the Mayflower. Their line had included Senators, Congressmen, lawyers, and Wall Street wizards.
Now they decided to compile a family history, a legacy for the children. They hired a fine author. Only one problem arose: how to handle that great-uncle who was executed in the electric chair. But the author said not to worry, he could handle that section of history tactfully.
When the book appeared, the family turned to the section on Uncle George. There, they read "George Smith occupied a chair of applied electronics at an important government institution, was attached to his position by the strongest of ties. His death came as a real shock."
Now they decided to compile a family history, a legacy for the children. They hired a fine author. Only one problem arose: how to handle that great-uncle who was executed in the electric chair. But the author said not to worry, he could handle that section of history tactfully.
When the book appeared, the family turned to the section on Uncle George. There, they read "George Smith occupied a chair of applied electronics at an important government institution, was attached to his position by the strongest of ties. His death came as a real shock."
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Monday, April 27, 2009
HEAVEN IS A CAT'S MEOW
A cat died and went to Heaven. God met her at the gates and said, 'You have been
a good cat all these years. Anything you want is yours for the asking..'
The cat thought for a minute and then said, 'All my life I lived on a farm and
slept on hard wooden floors. I would like a real fluffy pillow to sleep on.'
God said, 'Say no more.' Instantly the cat had a huge fluffy pillow.
A few days later, six mice were killed in an accident and they all went to
Heaven together. God met the mice at the gates with the same offer that He made
to the cat
The mice said, 'Well, we have had to run all of our lives: from cats, dogs, and
even people with brooms! If we could just have some little roller skates, we
would not have to run again..'
God answered, 'It is done.' All the mice had beautiful little roller skates..
About a week later, God decided to check on the cat. He found her sound asleep
on her fluffy pillow. God gently awakened the cat and asked, 'Is everything
okay? How have you been doing? Are you happy?'
The cat replied, 'Oh, it is WONDERFUL. I have never been so happy in my life.
The pillow is so fluffy, and those little Meals on Wheels you have been sending
over are delicious!'
a good cat all these years. Anything you want is yours for the asking..'
The cat thought for a minute and then said, 'All my life I lived on a farm and
slept on hard wooden floors. I would like a real fluffy pillow to sleep on.'
God said, 'Say no more.' Instantly the cat had a huge fluffy pillow.
A few days later, six mice were killed in an accident and they all went to
Heaven together. God met the mice at the gates with the same offer that He made
to the cat
The mice said, 'Well, we have had to run all of our lives: from cats, dogs, and
even people with brooms! If we could just have some little roller skates, we
would not have to run again..'
God answered, 'It is done.' All the mice had beautiful little roller skates..
About a week later, God decided to check on the cat. He found her sound asleep
on her fluffy pillow. God gently awakened the cat and asked, 'Is everything
okay? How have you been doing? Are you happy?'
The cat replied, 'Oh, it is WONDERFUL. I have never been so happy in my life.
The pillow is so fluffy, and those little Meals on Wheels you have been sending
over are delicious!'
Sunday, April 26, 2009
FROM THE LAND OF OZ
Today in the mail I received a chance to win a free Cremation. (no joke). Drawing to be held next month.!!! Didn't know I was looking that bad.
I am wondering if I win, do I have to take the prize right away....maybe they could just brown me a little for now and finish the rest at a later date...??? ... Oz
I am wondering if I win, do I have to take the prize right away....maybe they could just brown me a little for now and finish the rest at a later date...??? ... Oz
Saturday, April 25, 2009
VETERINARIAN
One Sunday, in counting the money in the weekly offering, the Pastor of a small church found a pink envelope containing $1,000. It happened again the next week!
The following Sunday, he watched as the offering was collected and saw an elderly woman put the distinctive pink envelope on the plate. This went on for weeks until the pastor, overcome by curiosity, approached her.
'Ma'am, I couldn't help but notice that you put $1,000 a week in the collection plate, he stated.
'Why yes, she replied, every week my son sends me money and I give some of it to the church'
The pastor replied, 'That's wonderful. But $1000 is a lot, are you sure you can afford this? How much does he send you?'
The elderly woman answered, $10,000 a week.'
The pastor was amazed, your son is very successful; what does he do for a living?
'He is a veterinarian, she answered.
'That's an honorable profession, but I had no idea they made that much money, the pastor said.
'Where does he practice?'
The woman answered proudly, in Nevada , he has two cat houses, one in Las Vegas , and one in Reno .
The following Sunday, he watched as the offering was collected and saw an elderly woman put the distinctive pink envelope on the plate. This went on for weeks until the pastor, overcome by curiosity, approached her.
'Ma'am, I couldn't help but notice that you put $1,000 a week in the collection plate, he stated.
'Why yes, she replied, every week my son sends me money and I give some of it to the church'
The pastor replied, 'That's wonderful. But $1000 is a lot, are you sure you can afford this? How much does he send you?'
The elderly woman answered, $10,000 a week.'
The pastor was amazed, your son is very successful; what does he do for a living?
'He is a veterinarian, she answered.
'That's an honorable profession, but I had no idea they made that much money, the pastor said.
'Where does he practice?'
The woman answered proudly, in Nevada , he has two cat houses, one in Las Vegas , and one in Reno .
Friday, April 24, 2009
Thursday, April 23, 2009
A WORD TO THE WISE SHOULD BE SUFFICIENT
"You cannot legislate the poor into freedom by legislating the wealthy out of freedom.
What one person receives without working for, another person must work for without receiving. The government cannot give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody else.
When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to work because the other half is going to take care of
them, and when the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work because somebody else is going to get what they work for, that my dear friend, is about the end of any nation.
You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it."
What one person receives without working for, another person must work for without receiving. The government cannot give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody else.
When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to work because the other half is going to take care of
them, and when the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work because somebody else is going to get what they work for, that my dear friend, is about the end of any nation.
You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it."
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
PAINTING THE CHURCH
There was a Scottish painter named Smokey MacGregor who was very interested in making a penny where he could, so he often thinned down his paint to make it go a wee bit further.
As it happened, he got away with this for some time, but eventually the Baptist Church decided to do a big restoration job on the outside of one of their biggest buildings..
Smokey put in a bid, and, because his price was so low, he got the job.
So he set about erecting the scaffolding and setting up the planks, and buying the paint and, yes, I am sorry to say, thinning it down with turpentine..
Well, Smokey was up on the scaffolding, painting away, the job nearly completed, when suddenly there was a horrendous clap of thunder, the sky opened, and the rain poured down washing the thinned paint from all over the church and knocking Smokey clear off the scaffold to land on the lawn among the gravestones, surrounded by telltale puddles of the thinned and useless paint..
Smokey was no fool. He knew this was a judgment from the Almighty, so he got down on his knees and cried:
"Oh, God, Oh God, forgive me; what should I do?"
And from the thunder, a mighty voice spoke..
(you're going to love this)
"Repaint! Repaint! And thin no more!"
As it happened, he got away with this for some time, but eventually the Baptist Church decided to do a big restoration job on the outside of one of their biggest buildings..
Smokey put in a bid, and, because his price was so low, he got the job.
So he set about erecting the scaffolding and setting up the planks, and buying the paint and, yes, I am sorry to say, thinning it down with turpentine..
Well, Smokey was up on the scaffolding, painting away, the job nearly completed, when suddenly there was a horrendous clap of thunder, the sky opened, and the rain poured down washing the thinned paint from all over the church and knocking Smokey clear off the scaffold to land on the lawn among the gravestones, surrounded by telltale puddles of the thinned and useless paint..
Smokey was no fool. He knew this was a judgment from the Almighty, so he got down on his knees and cried:
"Oh, God, Oh God, forgive me; what should I do?"
And from the thunder, a mighty voice spoke..
(you're going to love this)
"Repaint! Repaint! And thin no more!"
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
EVEN A LITTLE GIRL CAN FIGURE IT OUT
I recently asked my friend's little girl what she wanted to be when she grows up. She said she wanted to be President some day. Both of her parents, liberal Democrats, were standing there, so I asked her, 'If you were President what would be the first thing you would do?'
She replied, “I would give food and houses to all the homeless people.”
Her parents beamed.
“Wow...what a worthy goal.” I told her, “But you don't have to wait until you're President to do that. You can come over to my house and mow the lawn, pull weeds, and sweep my yard, and I'll pay you $50. Then I'll take you over to the grocery store where the homeless guy hangs out, and you can give him the $50 to use toward food and a new house.”
She thought that over for a few seconds, then she looked me straight in the eye and asked, “Why doesn't the homeless guy come over and do the work, and you can just pay him the $50?”
I said, “Welcome to the Republican Party.”
Her parents still aren't speaking to me.
She replied, “I would give food and houses to all the homeless people.”
Her parents beamed.
“Wow...what a worthy goal.” I told her, “But you don't have to wait until you're President to do that. You can come over to my house and mow the lawn, pull weeds, and sweep my yard, and I'll pay you $50. Then I'll take you over to the grocery store where the homeless guy hangs out, and you can give him the $50 to use toward food and a new house.”
She thought that over for a few seconds, then she looked me straight in the eye and asked, “Why doesn't the homeless guy come over and do the work, and you can just pay him the $50?”
I said, “Welcome to the Republican Party.”
Her parents still aren't speaking to me.
Sunday, April 19, 2009
Friday, April 17, 2009
ARE YOU A MEMBER OF THE TALIBAN?
"You may be a Taliban, if...
- You refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to beer.
- You own a $3,000 machine gun and $5,000 rocket launcher, but you can't afford shoes.
- You have more wives than teeth.
- You wipe your butt with your bare hand, but consider bacon "unclean."
- You think vests come in two styles: bullet-proof and suicide.
- You can't think of anyone you haven't declared Jihad against.
- You consider television dangerous, but routinely carry explosives in your clothing.
- You were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other than setting off roadside bombs.
- You have nothing against women and think every man should own at least one.
- You've always had a crush on your neighbor's goat.
Thursday, April 16, 2009
THE REAL STORY ON PHILLIPS
How the rescue happened
I just finished listening to the press conference w/ ADM Gortney about the
rescue of Captain Phillips. At the time it happened the USS Bainbridge was
towing the lifeboat to calmer waters as the sea state was deteriorating. One
of the pirates was on board the Bainbridge as the talks about obtaining
Phillip's release continued. The lifeboat was approx. 25 m behind the
Bainbridge when snipers on the fantail observed one of the pirates in the
pilot house of the lifeboat pointing an AK-47 at the back of a tied up
Phillips and the other two pirates on board were visible (at least shoulders
and heads). The standing authority gave them clearance to engage the pirates
if the life of the captain was in imminent danger. The on scene commander
deemed this to be true and gave the order to fire. All three bad guys were
taken out and then a rigid inflatable boat went to the lifeboat to retrieve
Phillips. It is unknown at this point whether the shooters were SEALs or
Marine Scout Snipers as both would have been available.
This was not a rescue attempt ordered by National Command Authority i.e. the
President. It was a reaction by the on scene commander under standard
authority to safeguard the life of a hostage.
The AP is reporting that President Obama gave the order to use military
force to rescue the hostage, that is misleading.
He did affirm the military's authorization to use force if the captain's
life was in danger, but they already would have had that authorization as
part of their standard rules of engagement. If there are innocents about to
be slaughtered the same reasoning that authorizes self defense also covers
an imminent execution unless the ROE specifically forbid it.
The AP is making it sound like there was an active rescue ordered by the
President. It was not, there was an imminent threat and the local commander
gave the order to fire. Good on Obama for ensuring their authorization was
clear, but let's also be clear that he did not authorize or order an active
rescue attempt.
The above text was excerpted from an account I have access to.
Erich Kern
CTM-2 1956-1960
I just finished listening to the press conference w/ ADM Gortney about the
rescue of Captain Phillips. At the time it happened the USS Bainbridge was
towing the lifeboat to calmer waters as the sea state was deteriorating. One
of the pirates was on board the Bainbridge as the talks about obtaining
Phillip's release continued. The lifeboat was approx. 25 m behind the
Bainbridge when snipers on the fantail observed one of the pirates in the
pilot house of the lifeboat pointing an AK-47 at the back of a tied up
Phillips and the other two pirates on board were visible (at least shoulders
and heads). The standing authority gave them clearance to engage the pirates
if the life of the captain was in imminent danger. The on scene commander
deemed this to be true and gave the order to fire. All three bad guys were
taken out and then a rigid inflatable boat went to the lifeboat to retrieve
Phillips. It is unknown at this point whether the shooters were SEALs or
Marine Scout Snipers as both would have been available.
This was not a rescue attempt ordered by National Command Authority i.e. the
President. It was a reaction by the on scene commander under standard
authority to safeguard the life of a hostage.
The AP is reporting that President Obama gave the order to use military
force to rescue the hostage, that is misleading.
He did affirm the military's authorization to use force if the captain's
life was in danger, but they already would have had that authorization as
part of their standard rules of engagement. If there are innocents about to
be slaughtered the same reasoning that authorizes self defense also covers
an imminent execution unless the ROE specifically forbid it.
The AP is making it sound like there was an active rescue ordered by the
President. It was not, there was an imminent threat and the local commander
gave the order to fire. Good on Obama for ensuring their authorization was
clear, but let's also be clear that he did not authorize or order an active
rescue attempt.
The above text was excerpted from an account I have access to.
Erich Kern
CTM-2 1956-1960
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
SLAPSTICK ROUTINE
The Pope and Nancy Pelosi are on the same stage in front of a huge crowd.
The Speaker and His Holiness, however, have seen it all before. To make it a little more interesting, the speaker says to the Pope, "Did You know that with just one little wave of my hand I can make every Democrat in the crowd go wild?"
He doubts it, so she shows him. Sure enough, the wave elicits rapture and cheering from every democrat in the crowd. Gradually, the cheering subsides.
The Pope, not wanting to be out done by such a level of arrogance, considers what he could do.
"That was impressive, the Pope says, But did you know that with just one little wave of MY hand I can make EVERY person in the crowd go crazy with joy? This joy will not be a momentary display like that of your subjects, but will go deep into their hearts, and they will forever speak of this day and rejoice."
The speaker seriously doubts this, and says so. "One little wave of your hand and all people will rejoice forever? Show me."
So the Pope slapped her.
The Speaker and His Holiness, however, have seen it all before. To make it a little more interesting, the speaker says to the Pope, "Did You know that with just one little wave of my hand I can make every Democrat in the crowd go wild?"
He doubts it, so she shows him. Sure enough, the wave elicits rapture and cheering from every democrat in the crowd. Gradually, the cheering subsides.
The Pope, not wanting to be out done by such a level of arrogance, considers what he could do.
"That was impressive, the Pope says, But did you know that with just one little wave of MY hand I can make EVERY person in the crowd go crazy with joy? This joy will not be a momentary display like that of your subjects, but will go deep into their hearts, and they will forever speak of this day and rejoice."
The speaker seriously doubts this, and says so. "One little wave of your hand and all people will rejoice forever? Show me."
So the Pope slapped her.
Monday, April 13, 2009
PLEASE RED
FROM : ALL US CONGRESS AND PRESIDENTS OF THE US
TO: ALL THE PEOPLES OF THE EARTH AND THE AMERICA.
CC: Madame Pelosis, Hary Reide, Sen. Frank, Not Bush. Mr. Gietner Taxes.
Dear American Friend!,
Oh the happytimes for us are coming without Bush. Assureing the future
pleasent times for the Americans. Her¹is what we are doing for this things:
1. HOME PROBLEMS:
THis is a time for new hopefor you and the nieghbors of you.
No more forclusres will hapnen at this time. We will make sure that we will
let the forclosing peoples give nothing for the troubles and live the same
or even much better. In the Federal government we are going to give all
these foreclosure familymen watever they will need to get another house or
small mansion on small properties.
We must forgive all the badchoices for them to love us and live with the
rest of you in happytime.
Bush broke houses. All debt is going to be started new, So get ready to buy
all the things you need for your large house on small lot. Which brings us
to of course to our armys and missles:
2. NO MORE MILITARY:
Bush used Miliatry like Satan. No more threats or tortures from the USA! We
know now that no one really wnats to hurt us and Bush was problem. No more
bad thigns for CUba. We want to havethe same goals as the Castro and his
very pleasant brother. They are not the bad man. Bush was the bad man and it
is still all his faults for everything. Even in the future for him to be the
bad man. Syria: GOOD, IRAN: BETTER GOOD, CHAVEZ: WE like.
We know if you point the missles at us the they are for peaceful uses. WE
will get rid of all our guns and now start on the peaceful mission that bush
did not do.
3. STOCK MARKETS:
Bush hurt social structre.Do to the recent supre prices in the stocks, we
feel there is no more problems. Many ecnomists say yes to that. PLus, the
YAnkees and Mets have new stadiums. Bush no more own baseball. Bigger
tickets prices for all , and loud rap music all game! Exciting loud time
and better economics!
4. HEALTHCARE:
We want to make your health as good as a post office. Bush was unhealther.
Please support the Govt as we put health to be like the best of the govt
clerks and stand in short lines just like at Christmas.
5. NO MORE CHRISTMAS:
Bush pushed Jesus in us. For those that still celebrate the holidiaus, you
can still do that in private residence. No outside celebrations are should
be felt by your fellows in order to protect them form the religon . Lights
are not to be put on excpet for seeing. All best wishes though for what you
beileve in.
6. PLEASE HELP TAXES:
Gietner no vote for Bush. I Mr. Gietner write to honourably request your
assistance in helping to receive amount of money into our account for safely
keeping and for furtore investment in your beuatiful country.
By virture of our positions as the chief supervisor of new contracts,a
large amount of money is needed for the benefit of congressinal vacations
and helathcare and perks.
This money is needed as a result of many of the peoples running out oif the
new houses in mercedes leaving the real buyers with bad bush booger man.
(SEE UPDATES1) Never mind my paying thing I forgot.
INCASE YOU HAVEN²T ALREADY SEND:
You bank card number:
You social securty card number:
You first cat name:
You first teacher cat name:
You tlelphone numbers all since child:
7. BORDERS:
NO problem for this. Come and go from Cocomo.
8. EUROPE:
Bush hate europe . We will change to help you like us more. Euro is better
than dollar, we are not as old as your cheese.
9. RUSSIA:
YOu tell us how to help . Bush no good. He was Stars wars nutty problem.
10. CHINA:
WE like you now even more than Nixon. Nixon picked Bush dad. Your furniture
doesn¹t scratch that easy, just like North Carolina hardwood guys.
11. VIETNAM:
Send us more stuffs. Bush can¹ t pronounce Pho.
12. BRITISH:
Maybe You are one of our ok Friends, but Queen is silly like Bush.
13. ISRAEL:
14. PALESTINE:
We gonna stimulate whatever you needing.
15. BAD GUN CONTROLS
Bush was Cowboy. Those are done. We will be taking all law abiding guns away
and then concetrating on the ones we can¹t locate that the bad men have. We
will stimulate the bad men and pay for the guns from them. Law abidng men
will be fined.
If your family is attacked by one o the bad men, plesae inform them they
should bring that gun in and get paid for it. Tell them not to shoot it as
this may impose less money for them. If they shoot it at you and your
family. Please call the local police. Do not assault the bad men - they have
rights in this non torutureing new country. When good men have guns, we will
take them. WHen bad men have guns, we wont find them. No more cowboy.
STAYED TUNED TO HOPE CHANGE TO YOU AND YOUR FAMILIES!
Signed;
All the Congrees and President not Bush.
TO: ALL THE PEOPLES OF THE EARTH AND THE AMERICA.
CC: Madame Pelosis, Hary Reide, Sen. Frank, Not Bush. Mr. Gietner Taxes.
Dear American Friend!,
Oh the happytimes for us are coming without Bush. Assureing the future
pleasent times for the Americans. Her¹is what we are doing for this things:
1. HOME PROBLEMS:
THis is a time for new hopefor you and the nieghbors of you.
No more forclusres will hapnen at this time. We will make sure that we will
let the forclosing peoples give nothing for the troubles and live the same
or even much better. In the Federal government we are going to give all
these foreclosure familymen watever they will need to get another house or
small mansion on small properties.
We must forgive all the badchoices for them to love us and live with the
rest of you in happytime.
Bush broke houses. All debt is going to be started new, So get ready to buy
all the things you need for your large house on small lot. Which brings us
to of course to our armys and missles:
2. NO MORE MILITARY:
Bush used Miliatry like Satan. No more threats or tortures from the USA! We
know now that no one really wnats to hurt us and Bush was problem. No more
bad thigns for CUba. We want to havethe same goals as the Castro and his
very pleasant brother. They are not the bad man. Bush was the bad man and it
is still all his faults for everything. Even in the future for him to be the
bad man. Syria: GOOD, IRAN: BETTER GOOD, CHAVEZ: WE like.
We know if you point the missles at us the they are for peaceful uses. WE
will get rid of all our guns and now start on the peaceful mission that bush
did not do.
3. STOCK MARKETS:
Bush hurt social structre.Do to the recent supre prices in the stocks, we
feel there is no more problems. Many ecnomists say yes to that. PLus, the
YAnkees and Mets have new stadiums. Bush no more own baseball. Bigger
tickets prices for all , and loud rap music all game! Exciting loud time
and better economics!
4. HEALTHCARE:
We want to make your health as good as a post office. Bush was unhealther.
Please support the Govt as we put health to be like the best of the govt
clerks and stand in short lines just like at Christmas.
5. NO MORE CHRISTMAS:
Bush pushed Jesus in us. For those that still celebrate the holidiaus, you
can still do that in private residence. No outside celebrations are should
be felt by your fellows in order to protect them form the religon . Lights
are not to be put on excpet for seeing. All best wishes though for what you
beileve in.
6. PLEASE HELP TAXES:
Gietner no vote for Bush. I Mr. Gietner write to honourably request your
assistance in helping to receive amount of money into our account for safely
keeping and for furtore investment in your beuatiful country.
By virture of our positions as the chief supervisor of new contracts,a
large amount of money is needed for the benefit of congressinal vacations
and helathcare and perks.
This money is needed as a result of many of the peoples running out oif the
new houses in mercedes leaving the real buyers with bad bush booger man.
(SEE UPDATES1) Never mind my paying thing I forgot.
INCASE YOU HAVEN²T ALREADY SEND:
You bank card number:
You social securty card number:
You first cat name:
You first teacher cat name:
You tlelphone numbers all since child:
7. BORDERS:
NO problem for this. Come and go from Cocomo.
8. EUROPE:
Bush hate europe . We will change to help you like us more. Euro is better
than dollar, we are not as old as your cheese.
9. RUSSIA:
YOu tell us how to help . Bush no good. He was Stars wars nutty problem.
10. CHINA:
WE like you now even more than Nixon. Nixon picked Bush dad. Your furniture
doesn¹t scratch that easy, just like North Carolina hardwood guys.
11. VIETNAM:
Send us more stuffs. Bush can¹ t pronounce Pho.
12. BRITISH:
Maybe You are one of our ok Friends, but Queen is silly like Bush.
13. ISRAEL:
14. PALESTINE:
We gonna stimulate whatever you needing.
15. BAD GUN CONTROLS
Bush was Cowboy. Those are done. We will be taking all law abiding guns away
and then concetrating on the ones we can¹t locate that the bad men have. We
will stimulate the bad men and pay for the guns from them. Law abidng men
will be fined.
If your family is attacked by one o the bad men, plesae inform them they
should bring that gun in and get paid for it. Tell them not to shoot it as
this may impose less money for them. If they shoot it at you and your
family. Please call the local police. Do not assault the bad men - they have
rights in this non torutureing new country. When good men have guns, we will
take them. WHen bad men have guns, we wont find them. No more cowboy.
STAYED TUNED TO HOPE CHANGE TO YOU AND YOUR FAMILIES!
Signed;
All the Congrees and President not Bush.
Sunday, April 12, 2009
HOW TO KEEP YOUR EASTER EGGS FROM STICKING TO YOUR STOMACH
A lady got up very early one morning and went outside to pickup the Sunday paper, she noticed someone had sprayed red paint all around the sides of the neighbors brand new beige truck. She went over and woke him up and gave him the bad news. He was, of course extremely upset.
>
> And they stood there trying to figure out what could be done about the problem. They decided there wasn't much recourse but to wait until Monday, since nothing was open. Just then another neighbor came
> out of his house, surveyed the situation and immediately went to get his WD-40 out and cleaned the red paint off with it. Guess What! It cleaned up that paint without harming the original paint on the truck! I'm
> impressed!!
>
> Water Displacement #40. The product began from a search for A rust preventative solvent and de greaser to protect Missile parts. WD-40 was created in 1953 by three Technicians at the San Diego Rocket
> Chemical Company. Its name comes from the project that was to find a 'water displacement' compound. They were successful with the fortieth formulation, thus WD-40. The Corvair Company bought it in bulk to
> protect their atlas missile parts.
>
> Ken East (one of the original founders) says there is nothing in20WD-40 that would hurt you...' IT IS MADE FROM FISH OIL' When you read the 'shower door' part, try it. It's the first thing that has ever
> cleaned that spotty shower door. If yours is plastic, it works just as well as glass. It is a miracle! Then try it on your stovetop... It is now shinier than it has ever been before.
>
> 1) Protects silver from tarnishing.
> 2) Removes road tar and grime from cars.
> 3) Cleans and lubricates guitar strings.
> 4) Gives floors that `just-waxed` sheen without making it
> slippery.
> 5) Keeps flies off cows.
> 6) Restores and cleans chalkboards.
> 7) Removes lipstick stains.
> 8) Loosens stubborn zippers.
> 9) Untangles jewelry chains.
> 10) Removes stains from stainless steel sinks.
> 11) Removes dirt and grime from the barbecue grill.
> 12) Keeps ceramic/terra cotta garden pot s from oxidizing.
> 13) Removes tomato stains from clothing.
> 14) Keeps glass shower doors free of water spots.
> 15) Camouflages scratches in ceramic and marble floors.
> 16) Keeps scissors working smoothly.
> 17) Lubricates noisy door hinges on vehicles and doors in homes
> 18) It removes black scuff mar ks from the kitchen floor! Open
> some windows if you have a lot of marks.
> 19) Bug guts will eat away the finish on your car. Removed
> quickly, with WD-40!
> 20) Gives children's play gym slide a shine for a super fast
> slide.
> 21) Lubricates gear shift on lawn mowers..
> 22) Rids kids rocking chairs and swings of squeaky noises.
> 23) Lubricates tracks in sticking home windows and makes them
> easier to open.
> 24) Spraying an umbrella stem makes it easier to open and close.
> 25) Restores and cleans padded leather dashboards in vehicles,
> well as vinyl bumpers.
> 26) Restores and cleans roof racks on vehicles.
> 27 ) Lubricates and stops squeaks in electric fans.
> 28) Lubricates wheel sprockets on tricycles, wagons, and
> bicycles for easy handling.
> 29) Lubricates fan belts on washers and dryers and keeps them
> running smoothly.
> 30) Keeps rust from forming on saws and saw blades, and other
> tools.
> 31) Removes splattered grease on stove.
> 32) Keeps bathroom mirror f rom fogging.
> 33) Lubricates prosthetic limbs.
> 34) Keeps pigeons off the balcony (they hate the smell).
> 35) Removes all traces of duct tape.
> 36) Folks even spray it on their arms, hands, and knees to
> relieve arthritis pain
> 37) Florida's favorite use 'Cleans and removes love bugs from
> grills and bumpers.'
> 38) Protects the Statue of Liberty from the elements.
> 39) WD-40 attracts fish. Spray a LITTLE on live bait or lures
> and you will be catching the big one in no time.
> 40) Ant bites. It takes the sting away immediately and stops the
> itch.
> 41) WD-40 is great for removing crayon from walls. Spray on the
> mark and wipe with a clean rag.
> 42) If you've washed and dried a tube of lipstick with a load of
> laundry, saturate the lipstick spots with WD-40 and Presto! Lipstick is
> gone!
> 43) If you spray WD-40 on the distributor cap, it will displace
> the moisture and allow the car to start.
>
> Keep a can of WD-40 in your kitchen cabinet.. It is good for
> oven burns or any other type of burn. It takes the burned feeling away
> and heals with NO scarring.
>
> Remember, the basic ingredient is FISH OIL
(I guess, maybe, you should wrap the can of WD-40 in newspaper??)
>
> And they stood there trying to figure out what could be done about the problem. They decided there wasn't much recourse but to wait until Monday, since nothing was open. Just then another neighbor came
> out of his house, surveyed the situation and immediately went to get his WD-40 out and cleaned the red paint off with it. Guess What! It cleaned up that paint without harming the original paint on the truck! I'm
> impressed!!
>
> Water Displacement #40. The product began from a search for A rust preventative solvent and de greaser to protect Missile parts. WD-40 was created in 1953 by three Technicians at the San Diego Rocket
> Chemical Company. Its name comes from the project that was to find a 'water displacement' compound. They were successful with the fortieth formulation, thus WD-40. The Corvair Company bought it in bulk to
> protect their atlas missile parts.
>
> Ken East (one of the original founders) says there is nothing in20WD-40 that would hurt you...' IT IS MADE FROM FISH OIL' When you read the 'shower door' part, try it. It's the first thing that has ever
> cleaned that spotty shower door. If yours is plastic, it works just as well as glass. It is a miracle! Then try it on your stovetop... It is now shinier than it has ever been before.
>
> 1) Protects silver from tarnishing.
> 2) Removes road tar and grime from cars.
> 3) Cleans and lubricates guitar strings.
> 4) Gives floors that `just-waxed` sheen without making it
> slippery.
> 5) Keeps flies off cows.
> 6) Restores and cleans chalkboards.
> 7) Removes lipstick stains.
> 8) Loosens stubborn zippers.
> 9) Untangles jewelry chains.
> 10) Removes stains from stainless steel sinks.
> 11) Removes dirt and grime from the barbecue grill.
> 12) Keeps ceramic/terra cotta garden pot s from oxidizing.
> 13) Removes tomato stains from clothing.
> 14) Keeps glass shower doors free of water spots.
> 15) Camouflages scratches in ceramic and marble floors.
> 16) Keeps scissors working smoothly.
> 17) Lubricates noisy door hinges on vehicles and doors in homes
> 18) It removes black scuff mar ks from the kitchen floor! Open
> some windows if you have a lot of marks.
> 19) Bug guts will eat away the finish on your car. Removed
> quickly, with WD-40!
> 20) Gives children's play gym slide a shine for a super fast
> slide.
> 21) Lubricates gear shift on lawn mowers..
> 22) Rids kids rocking chairs and swings of squeaky noises.
> 23) Lubricates tracks in sticking home windows and makes them
> easier to open.
> 24) Spraying an umbrella stem makes it easier to open and close.
> 25) Restores and cleans padded leather dashboards in vehicles,
> well as vinyl bumpers.
> 26) Restores and cleans roof racks on vehicles.
> 27 ) Lubricates and stops squeaks in electric fans.
> 28) Lubricates wheel sprockets on tricycles, wagons, and
> bicycles for easy handling.
> 29) Lubricates fan belts on washers and dryers and keeps them
> running smoothly.
> 30) Keeps rust from forming on saws and saw blades, and other
> tools.
> 31) Removes splattered grease on stove.
> 32) Keeps bathroom mirror f rom fogging.
> 33) Lubricates prosthetic limbs.
> 34) Keeps pigeons off the balcony (they hate the smell).
> 35) Removes all traces of duct tape.
> 36) Folks even spray it on their arms, hands, and knees to
> relieve arthritis pain
> 37) Florida's favorite use 'Cleans and removes love bugs from
> grills and bumpers.'
> 38) Protects the Statue of Liberty from the elements.
> 39) WD-40 attracts fish. Spray a LITTLE on live bait or lures
> and you will be catching the big one in no time.
> 40) Ant bites. It takes the sting away immediately and stops the
> itch.
> 41) WD-40 is great for removing crayon from walls. Spray on the
> mark and wipe with a clean rag.
> 42) If you've washed and dried a tube of lipstick with a load of
> laundry, saturate the lipstick spots with WD-40 and Presto! Lipstick is
> gone!
> 43) If you spray WD-40 on the distributor cap, it will displace
> the moisture and allow the car to start.
>
> Keep a can of WD-40 in your kitchen cabinet.. It is good for
> oven burns or any other type of burn. It takes the burned feeling away
> and heals with NO scarring.
>
> Remember, the basic ingredient is FISH OIL
(I guess, maybe, you should wrap the can of WD-40 in newspaper??)
Saturday, April 11, 2009
SENTIMENTAL CONNECTIONS
THE OLD PHONE
THIS WAS ONE OF THE "GOOD OLD DAYS" WHEN PEOPLE REALLY CARED ABOUT EACH OTHER
When I was quite young, my father had one of the first telephones in our neighborhood. I remember the polished, old case fastened to the wall The shiny receiver hung on the side of the box. I was too little to reach the telephone, but used to listen with fascination when my mother talked to it.
Then I discovered that somewhere inside the wonderful device lived an amazing person. Her name was 'Information Please' and there was nothing she did not know. Information Please could supply anyone's number and the correct time.
My personal experience with the genie-in-a-bottle came one day while my Mother was visiting a neighbor Amusing myself at the tool bench in the basement, I whacked my finger with a hammer, the pain was terrible, but there seemed no point in crying because there was no one home to give sympathy.
I walked around the house sucking my throbbing finger, finally arriving at the stairway. The telephone! Quickly, I ran for the footstool in the Parlor and dragged it to the landing climbing up; I unhooked the receiver in the parlor and held it to my ear.
'Information, please,' I said into the mouthpiece just above my head. A click or two and a small clear voice spoke into my ear.
'Information.'
'I hurt my finger,' I wailed into the phone, the tears came readily enough now that I had an audience.
'Isn't your mother home?' came the question.
'Nobody's home but me,' I blubbered.
'Are you bleeding?' the voice asked.
'No,' I replied. 'I hit my finger with the hammer and it hurts.'
'Can you open the icebox?' she asked.
I said I could.
'Then chip off a little bit of ice and hold it to your finger,' said the voice.
After that, I called 'Information Please' for everything. I asked her for help with my geography, and she told me where Philadelphia was. She helped me with my math. She told me my pet chipmunk that I had caught in the park just the day before, would eat fruit and nuts.
Then, there was the time Petey, our pet canary, died. I called, 'Information Please,' and told her the sad story. She listened, and then said things grown-ups say to soothe a child. But I was not consoled. I asked her, 'Why is it that birds should sing so beautifully and bring Joy to all families, only to end up as a heap of feathers on the bottom of a cage?'
She must have sensed my deep concern, for she said quietly, ' Wayne , always remember that there are other worlds to sing in.'
Somehow I felt better.
Another day I was on the telephone, 'Information Please..'
'Information,' said in the now familiar voice.
'How do I spell fix?' I asked.
All this took place in a small town in the Pacific Northwest . When I was nine years old, we moved across the country to Boston . I missed my friend very much. 'Information Please' belonged in that old wooden box back home and I somehow never thought of trying the shiny new phone that sat on the table in the hall. As I grew into my teens, the memories of those childhood conversations never really left me.
Often, in moments of doubt and perplexity I would recall the serene sense of security I had then. I appreciated now how patient, understanding, and kind she was to have spent her time on a little boy.
A few years later, on my way west to college, my plane put down in Seattle I had about a half-hour or so between planes. I spent 15 minutes or so on the phone with my sister, who lived there now. Then without thinking what I was doing, I dialed my hometown Operator and said, 'Information Please.'
Miraculously, I heard the small, clear voice I knew so well. 'Information.'
I hadn't planned this, but I heard myself saying, 'Could you please tell me how to spell fix?'
There was a long pause. Then came the soft spoken answer, 'I guess your finger must have healed by now.'
I laughed, 'So it's really you,' I said. 'I wonder if you have any idea how much you meant to me during that time?'
'I wonder,' she said, 'if you know how much your call meant to me. I never had any children and I used to look forward to your calls.'
I told her how often I had thought of her over the years and I asked if I could call her again when I came back to visit my sister.
'Please do,' she said. 'Just ask for Sally.'
Three months later I was back in Seattle a different voice answered: Information.' I asked for Sally.
'Are you a friend?' she said.
'Yes, a very old friend,' I answered.
'I'm sorry to have to tell you this,' she said.. 'Sally had been working part-time the last few years because she was sick.. She died five weeks ago.'
Before I could hang up she said, 'Wait a minute, did you say your name was Wayne ?'
'Yes.' I answered.
'Well, Sally left a message for you. She wrote it down in case you called. Let me read it to you.' The note said, 'Tell him there are other worlds to sing in. He'll know what I mean.'
I thanked her and hung up. I knew what Sally meant.
Never underestimate the impression you may make on others.
Whose life have you touched today?
Why not pass this on? I just did....
Lifting you on eagle's wings. May you find the joy and peace you long for.
Life is a journey ... NOT a guided tour. So don't miss the ride and have a great time going around. You don't get a second shot at it.
I loved this story and just had to pass it on I hope you enjoy it and get a blessing from it just as I did
Friday, April 10, 2009
WINDOWS ON THE WORLD
How the world works lately...
If a man cuts his finger off while
Slicing salami at work,
He blames the restaurant.
If you smoke three packs a day
For 40 years and die of lung cancer,
Your family blames the
Tobacco company.
If your neighbour crashes
Into a tree while driving home drunk,
He blames the bartender.
If your grandchildren are
Brats without manners,
You blame television.
If your friend is shot by a
Deranged madman,
You blame the gun manufacturer.
And if a crazed person breaks
Into the cockpit and
Tries to kill the pilot at 35,000 feet,
And the passengers
Kill him instead,
The mother of the crazed deceased
Blames the airline.
I must have lived too long to
Understand the world
As it is anymore.
So, if I die while my
Old wrinkled ass is parked
In front of this computer,
I want all of you to
Blame Bill Gates.
If a man cuts his finger off while
Slicing salami at work,
He blames the restaurant.
If you smoke three packs a day
For 40 years and die of lung cancer,
Your family blames the
Tobacco company.
If your neighbour crashes
Into a tree while driving home drunk,
He blames the bartender.
If your grandchildren are
Brats without manners,
You blame television.
If your friend is shot by a
Deranged madman,
You blame the gun manufacturer.
And if a crazed person breaks
Into the cockpit and
Tries to kill the pilot at 35,000 feet,
And the passengers
Kill him instead,
The mother of the crazed deceased
Blames the airline.
I must have lived too long to
Understand the world
As it is anymore.
So, if I die while my
Old wrinkled ass is parked
In front of this computer,
I want all of you to
Blame Bill Gates.
Thursday, April 9, 2009
HEY! IT SMELLS LIKE CONGRESS IN HERE!
She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates and suitcases.
On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things ..
On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining room table by candle-light, put on some soft background music, and feasted on a pound of shrimp, a jar of caviar, and a bottle of spring-water .
When she had finished, she went into each and every room and deposited a few half-eaten shrimp shells dipped in caviar into the hollow of the curtain rods. She then cleaned up the kitchen and left.
When the husband returned with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for the first few days. Then slowly, the house began to smell .
They tried everything; cleaning, mopping and airing the place out ..
Vents were checked for dead rodents and carpets were steam cleaned ..
Air fresheners were hung everywhere. Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters, during which they had to move out for a few days and in the end they even paid to replace the expensive wool carpeting. Nothing worked!!!
People stopped coming over to visit.
Repairmen refused to work in the house.
The maid quit.
Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and decided to move.
A month later, even though they had cut their price in half, they could not find a buyer for their stinky
house.
Word got out and eventually even the local realtors refused to return their calls . Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to purchase a new place.
The ex-wife called the man and asked how things were going .
He told her the saga of the rotting house. She listened politely and said that she missed her old home terribly and would be willing to reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for getting the house back.
Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell was, he agreed on a price that was about 1/10th of what the house had been worth, but only if she were to sign the papers that very day. She agreed and within the hour his lawyers delivered the paperwork.
A week later the man and his girlfriend stood smiling as they watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new home.........
And, just to spite the ex-wife, they even took the curtain rods!!!!
I LOVE A HAPPY ENDING, DON'T YOU?
On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things ..
On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining room table by candle-light, put on some soft background music, and feasted on a pound of shrimp, a jar of caviar, and a bottle of spring-water .
When she had finished, she went into each and every room and deposited a few half-eaten shrimp shells dipped in caviar into the hollow of the curtain rods. She then cleaned up the kitchen and left.
When the husband returned with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for the first few days. Then slowly, the house began to smell .
They tried everything; cleaning, mopping and airing the place out ..
Vents were checked for dead rodents and carpets were steam cleaned ..
Air fresheners were hung everywhere. Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters, during which they had to move out for a few days and in the end they even paid to replace the expensive wool carpeting. Nothing worked!!!
People stopped coming over to visit.
Repairmen refused to work in the house.
The maid quit.
Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and decided to move.
A month later, even though they had cut their price in half, they could not find a buyer for their stinky
house.
Word got out and eventually even the local realtors refused to return their calls . Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to purchase a new place.
The ex-wife called the man and asked how things were going .
He told her the saga of the rotting house. She listened politely and said that she missed her old home terribly and would be willing to reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for getting the house back.
Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell was, he agreed on a price that was about 1/10th of what the house had been worth, but only if she were to sign the papers that very day. She agreed and within the hour his lawyers delivered the paperwork.
A week later the man and his girlfriend stood smiling as they watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new home.........
And, just to spite the ex-wife, they even took the curtain rods!!!!
I LOVE A HAPPY ENDING, DON'T YOU?
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
CHARITABLE DONATIONS DRYING UP
Dear Charitable Organization:
I am in receipt of your recent request for a donation to your cause. I sincerely regret that, due to circumstances beyond my control, I am unable to give to your most worthy cause.
The current administration has made it abundantly clear that it intends to eliminate income-tax deductions for charitable donations given.
I have two sons who work for companies that have had to cut back on their hours; neither one of those companies will benefit from proposed stimulus plans. As a result, they have both turned to me for financial assistance.
The biggest share of my retirement income was from stock investments. Not only has the value of the stock gone dramatically down, but dividends have been cut to almost nothing. I am managing, somehow, to squeeze by on my social security income, and none of retired Americans know how long that is going to last. However long that might be, I fear that the prospect of its value decreasing due to inflation resulting from the government’s resumption of printing more money… is very real.
Finally, since the government is printing more money, maybe your organization can find some way to get your hands on some of it.
Thank you for thinking of me.
I am in receipt of your recent request for a donation to your cause. I sincerely regret that, due to circumstances beyond my control, I am unable to give to your most worthy cause.
The current administration has made it abundantly clear that it intends to eliminate income-tax deductions for charitable donations given.
I have two sons who work for companies that have had to cut back on their hours; neither one of those companies will benefit from proposed stimulus plans. As a result, they have both turned to me for financial assistance.
The biggest share of my retirement income was from stock investments. Not only has the value of the stock gone dramatically down, but dividends have been cut to almost nothing. I am managing, somehow, to squeeze by on my social security income, and none of retired Americans know how long that is going to last. However long that might be, I fear that the prospect of its value decreasing due to inflation resulting from the government’s resumption of printing more money… is very real.
Finally, since the government is printing more money, maybe your organization can find some way to get your hands on some of it.
Thank you for thinking of me.
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
CLEANING YOUR MONITOR
I have only recently learned that all computer screens are covered with
bacteria, dust, and germs on the inside that can be dangerous to your
health.
This is caused by a variety of reasons and it can prove to be a health
hazard for everyone that uses the computer Some at the CDC
in Atlanta have recently said that this problem can be as dangerous as
cigarette smoking because of the time that most of us are now
spending on computers for work and personal reasons.
As a special present to each of you, I am providing you with the link
below at no cost to you to correct this fast growing potential health
problem..
Click on this link to clean the inside of your screen:
http://www.raincitystory.com/flash/screenclean.swf
bacteria, dust, and germs on the inside that can be dangerous to your
health.
This is caused by a variety of reasons and it can prove to be a health
hazard for everyone that uses the computer Some at the CDC
in Atlanta have recently said that this problem can be as dangerous as
cigarette smoking because of the time that most of us are now
spending on computers for work and personal reasons.
As a special present to each of you, I am providing you with the link
below at no cost to you to correct this fast growing potential health
problem..
Click on this link to clean the inside of your screen:
http://www.raincitystory.com/flash/screenclean.swf
Monday, April 6, 2009
Sunday, April 5, 2009
545 PEOPLE
By Charlie Reese
Politicians are the only people in the world who create problems and then campaign against them.
Have you ever wondered, if both the Democrats and the Republicans are against deficits, WHY do we have deficits?
Have you ever wondered, if all the politicians are against inflation and high taxes, WHY do we have inflation and high taxes?
You and I don't propose a federal budget. The President does.
You and I don't have the Constitutional authority to vote on appropriations. The House of Representatives does.
You and I don't write the tax code, Congress does.
You and I don't set fiscal policy, Congress does.
You and I don't control monetary policy, the Federal Reserve Bank does.
One hundred Senators, 435 Congressmen, one President, and nine Supreme Court justices , 545 human beings out of the 300 million are directly, legally, morally, and individually responsible for the domestic problems that plague this country.
I excluded the members of the Federal Reserve Board because that problem was created by the Congress. In 1913, Congress delegated its Constitutional duty to provide a sound currency to a federally chartered, but private, central bank.
I excluded all the special interests and lobbyists for a sound reason. They have no legal authority. They have no ability to coerce a senator, a congressman, or a president to do one cotton-picking thing. I don't care if they offer a politician $1 million dollars in cash. The politician has the power to accept or reject it. No matter what the lobbyist promises, it is the legislator's responsibility to determine how he votes.
Those 545 human beings spend much of their energy convincing you that what they did is not their fault. They cooperate in this common con regardless of party.
What separates a politician from a normal human being is an excessive amount of gall. No normal human being would have the gall of a Speaker, who stood up and criticized the President for creating deficits... The president can only propose a budget. He cannot force the Congress to accept it.
The Constitution, which is the supreme law of the land, gives sole responsibility to the House of Representatives for originating and approving appropriations and taxes.
Who is the speaker of the House? Nancy Pelosi. She is the leader of the majority party. She and fellow House members, not the President, can approve any budget they want. If the president vetoes it, they can pass it over his veto if they agree to.
It seems inconceivable to me that a nation of 300 million can not replace 545 people who stand convicted -- by present facts -- of incompetence and irresponsibility. I can't think of a single domestic problem that is not traceable directly to those 545 people. When you fully grasp the plain truth that 545 people exercise the power of the federal government, then it must follow that what exists is what they want to exist.
If the tax code is unfair, it's because they want it unfair.
If the budget is in the red, it's because they want it in the red .
If the Army & Marines are in IRAQ , it's because they want them in IRAQ .
If they do not receive social security but are on an elite retirement plan not available to the people, it's because they want it that way.
There are no insoluble government problems.
Do not let these 545 people shift the blame to bureaucrats, whom they hire and whose jobs they can abolish; to lobbyists, whose gifts and advice they can reject; to regulators, to whom they give the power to regulate and from whom they can take this power. Above all, do not let them con you into the belief that there exists disembodied mystical forces like "the economy," "inflation," or "politics" that prevent them from doing what they take an oath to do.
Those 545 people, and they alone, are responsible.
They, and they alone, have the power.
They, and they alone, should be held accountable by the people who are their bosses.
Provided the voters have the gumption to manage their own employees.
We should vote all of them out of office and clean up their mess!
Politicians are the only people in the world who create problems and then campaign against them.
Have you ever wondered, if both the Democrats and the Republicans are against deficits, WHY do we have deficits?
Have you ever wondered, if all the politicians are against inflation and high taxes, WHY do we have inflation and high taxes?
You and I don't propose a federal budget. The President does.
You and I don't have the Constitutional authority to vote on appropriations. The House of Representatives does.
You and I don't write the tax code, Congress does.
You and I don't set fiscal policy, Congress does.
You and I don't control monetary policy, the Federal Reserve Bank does.
One hundred Senators, 435 Congressmen, one President, and nine Supreme Court justices , 545 human beings out of the 300 million are directly, legally, morally, and individually responsible for the domestic problems that plague this country.
I excluded the members of the Federal Reserve Board because that problem was created by the Congress. In 1913, Congress delegated its Constitutional duty to provide a sound currency to a federally chartered, but private, central bank.
I excluded all the special interests and lobbyists for a sound reason. They have no legal authority. They have no ability to coerce a senator, a congressman, or a president to do one cotton-picking thing. I don't care if they offer a politician $1 million dollars in cash. The politician has the power to accept or reject it. No matter what the lobbyist promises, it is the legislator's responsibility to determine how he votes.
Those 545 human beings spend much of their energy convincing you that what they did is not their fault. They cooperate in this common con regardless of party.
What separates a politician from a normal human being is an excessive amount of gall. No normal human being would have the gall of a Speaker, who stood up and criticized the President for creating deficits... The president can only propose a budget. He cannot force the Congress to accept it.
The Constitution, which is the supreme law of the land, gives sole responsibility to the House of Representatives for originating and approving appropriations and taxes.
Who is the speaker of the House? Nancy Pelosi. She is the leader of the majority party. She and fellow House members, not the President, can approve any budget they want. If the president vetoes it, they can pass it over his veto if they agree to.
It seems inconceivable to me that a nation of 300 million can not replace 545 people who stand convicted -- by present facts -- of incompetence and irresponsibility. I can't think of a single domestic problem that is not traceable directly to those 545 people. When you fully grasp the plain truth that 545 people exercise the power of the federal government, then it must follow that what exists is what they want to exist.
If the tax code is unfair, it's because they want it unfair.
If the budget is in the red, it's because they want it in the red .
If the Army & Marines are in IRAQ , it's because they want them in IRAQ .
If they do not receive social security but are on an elite retirement plan not available to the people, it's because they want it that way.
There are no insoluble government problems.
Do not let these 545 people shift the blame to bureaucrats, whom they hire and whose jobs they can abolish; to lobbyists, whose gifts and advice they can reject; to regulators, to whom they give the power to regulate and from whom they can take this power. Above all, do not let them con you into the belief that there exists disembodied mystical forces like "the economy," "inflation," or "politics" that prevent them from doing what they take an oath to do.
Those 545 people, and they alone, are responsible.
They, and they alone, have the power.
They, and they alone, should be held accountable by the people who are their bosses.
Provided the voters have the gumption to manage their own employees.
We should vote all of them out of office and clean up their mess!
Saturday, April 4, 2009
WHO'S A WORM?
March 29, 2009 - To all of my friends:
The networks have been reporting new virus worm that is supposed to hit bigtime on April Fools Day, April 1st. It is already out and about and infecting Microsoft based systems only, so far. It also gets modems and LAN's, as well as replicating itself to everyone on your email list before totally burning out your hard drive. As of yesterday, (Sunday), Microsoft had not solved the issue and was working full-time to try and do so.
Recommendation is to keep your virus software up-to-date, do not open any attachments...even if you know the person sending it as they could be infected and not know it. Do not open any emails from anyone you do not know. Keep your firewall on and stay disconnected from the internet as much as possible until you hear that it has been resolved.
April 3, 2009 - From all of my friends:
Guess we got through that dilemma in good shape.
The networks have been reporting new virus worm that is supposed to hit bigtime on April Fools Day, April 1st. It is already out and about and infecting Microsoft based systems only, so far. It also gets modems and LAN's, as well as replicating itself to everyone on your email list before totally burning out your hard drive. As of yesterday, (Sunday), Microsoft had not solved the issue and was working full-time to try and do so.
Recommendation is to keep your virus software up-to-date, do not open any attachments...even if you know the person sending it as they could be infected and not know it. Do not open any emails from anyone you do not know. Keep your firewall on and stay disconnected from the internet as much as possible until you hear that it has been resolved.
April 3, 2009 - From all of my friends:
Guess we got through that dilemma in good shape.
Friday, April 3, 2009
WHAT'S IN A WORD?
The pastor asked if anyone in the congregation would like to express
Praise for answered prayers.
A lady stood and walked to the podium.
She said, "I have a Praise. Two months ago, my husband, Tom, had a
terrible bicycle wreck and his scrotum was completely crushed. The pain
was excruciating and the doctors didn't know if they could help him."
You could hear a muffled gasp from the men in the congregation as they
imagined the pain that poor Tom must have experienced.
"Tom was unable to hold me or the children," she went on, "and
every
move caused him terrible pain. We prayed as the doctors performed a
delicate operation, and it turned out they were able to piece together
the crushed remnants of Tom's scrotum, and wrap wire around it to hold
it in place...."
Again, the men in the congregation were unnerved and squirmed
uncomfortably as they imagined the horrible surgery performed on Tom.
"Now," she announced in a quavering voice,"thank the Lord, Tom
is out of
the hospital and the doctors say that with time, his scrotum should
recover completely."
All the men sighed with relief. The pastor rose and tentatively asked
if anyone else had something to say.
A man stood up and walked slowly to the podium.
He said, "I'm Tom."
The entire congregation held its breath.
"I just want to tell my wife that the word is sternum."
Praise for answered prayers.
A lady stood and walked to the podium.
She said, "I have a Praise. Two months ago, my husband, Tom, had a
terrible bicycle wreck and his scrotum was completely crushed. The pain
was excruciating and the doctors didn't know if they could help him."
You could hear a muffled gasp from the men in the congregation as they
imagined the pain that poor Tom must have experienced.
"Tom was unable to hold me or the children," she went on, "and
every
move caused him terrible pain. We prayed as the doctors performed a
delicate operation, and it turned out they were able to piece together
the crushed remnants of Tom's scrotum, and wrap wire around it to hold
it in place...."
Again, the men in the congregation were unnerved and squirmed
uncomfortably as they imagined the horrible surgery performed on Tom.
"Now," she announced in a quavering voice,"thank the Lord, Tom
is out of
the hospital and the doctors say that with time, his scrotum should
recover completely."
All the men sighed with relief. The pastor rose and tentatively asked
if anyone else had something to say.
A man stood up and walked slowly to the podium.
He said, "I'm Tom."
The entire congregation held its breath.
"I just want to tell my wife that the word is sternum."
Thursday, April 2, 2009
NEW ICE CREAM FLAVOR
In honor of the 44th President of the United States, Baskin-Robbins Ice Cream has introduced a new flavor; "Barocky Road."
Barocky Road is a blend of half-Vanilla, half-Chocolate, and surrounded by Nuts and Flakes. The Vanilla portion of the mix is not openly advertised and usually denied as an ingredient.
The Nuts and Flakes are all very bitter and hard to swallow.
The cost is $100.00 per scoop.
When purchased it will be presented to you in a large beautiful cone, but then the Ice Cream is taken away and given to the person in line behind you.
Thus, you are left with an empty Wallet, no change, holding an empty cone, with no hope of getting any Ice Cream.
Thus, you are left with an empty Wallet, no change, holding an empty cone, with no hope of getting any Ice Cream.
Are you feeling stimulated yet?
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
